Mistakes We Knew We Were Making

and all our sins come back to haunt us in the end
to hang around and tap us on the shoulder
and smile
silent
it's all implied
"you'll die trying to live this down. you might as well forget it."
still, i'm convinced that wondering what if is the worst thing there is
so we bottled and shelved all our regrets
let them ferment and came back to our senses
drove back home and slept a few days
woke up and laughed at how stupid we used to be
all these lines fall short of what i had in mind
a failed attempt to capsulize a feeling
so i just try fail and try and try again
someday i swear i'm going to get it
because i'm convinced that giving in is the worst thing there is
we'll get over it
sad, strong, safe and sober
we'll move forward
and know where we went wrong
but "you can't go home again."



Existentialism on Prom Night

when the sun came up
we were sleeping in
sunk inside our blankets
sprawled across the bed
and we were dreaming
there are moments when i know it
and the world revolves around us
and we're keeping it
keeping it all going
this delicate balance
vulnerable
all knowing
(sing like you think no one's listening)
you would kill for this
just a little bit
so, sing me something soft
sad and delicate
or loud and out of key
sing me anything
we're glad for what we've got
done with what we've lost
our whole lives laid out right in front of us



It's for the Best

it takes more time than i've ever had
drains the life from me
makes me want to forget
as young as i was, i felt older back then
more disciplined, stronger and certain
but i was scared to death of eternity
i was saved by grace
but destroyed by naivety
and i lied to myself
and said it was for the best
so now faith is replaced with a logic so cold
i've disregarded what i was
now that i'm older
and i know much more than i did back then
but the more i learn
the more i can't understand
and i've become content with this life that i lead
where i drink to much and don't believe in much of anything
and i lie to myself
and say "it's for the best."
we're moving forward, but holding ourselves back
and we're waiting on something that will never come



The Tension and the Terror

all the boys voices cracking
oh, the moaning half tones
come summertime, we're all the same age here
all the tension and the terror
thin limbed gorgeous green eyes smiling
and i'm going straight to hell
all the possibility and promise just weighs on me so heavily
and i try but i'm not convincing
your lips, they pout and twist
and i die trying just to keep myself from kissing you.
you take in everything with a certainty i envy
it's somehow all i need
just keep me guessing please
darling, all of these awkwardjumpstartstalling conversations
mean much more to me than anything
it comes down to me and you
and whether we're supposed to or not, we still will
we're so much better off than them
all the possibility and promise just weighs on me so heavily...
a look
a laugh
a smile
a second passes by and i regret it
words just aren't right
sometimes i just can't explain
all the ways you devastate me
always on my mind



A Slow Descent

i'm tired
cynical and broken, but wiser
heavy with a sense of resentment
but i used to be so much different
i used to have so much faith
when i started
you knew that i always meant it
i knew i could make a difference
i struggled to be heard
and then finally, one day people started listening
and i knew it
but as soon as it began it was ruined
a slow descent from unique to routine
over and over
"just do it again and this time with feeling"
the spotlight
the focus on the friends and the feelings
that made those stupid songs all worth singing
and don't you say a word
unless you're pretty sure that you want it analyzed
so we drove
for what seemed like days
over roads
and four lane highways
we said all we had to say
and i realized in time that it didn't mean anything

never
not ever again...
not like that
"it's only a matter of time"



It's Everybody's Fault but Mine

everything has got a sense of permanence attached to it
sucks you in and feeds you until finally you're used to it
and now you're so dependant
now you're so defensive
now you're finding reasons why their all wrong
so in love with all your vices
you can't change or move on
and it comes to this
such tragic endings
you shake your fist
just stop pretending
it comes to this
such tragic endings
it's hit or miss
just stop pretending now
everyone keeps asking you "what exactly happened?"
you've got all these excuses but
you don't have an answer
because you don't know your self
you don't know your own weaknesses
you're always innocent
because you're never honest
so wrapped up in your perspective
morality has become an opinion
it comes to this
such tragic endings
you shake your fist
just stop pretending
it comes to this
such tragic endings
it's hit or miss
just stop pretending now
you wanted to be left alone
but you wanted someone to say
"boy i'm always here for you"
but you can't have it both ways
now no one knows what youve done
no one knows what youve done
no one knows what youve done
and it's just as well
the only thing that comforts me is
knowing that you'll never be happy